It’s another morning, waking up without Nathan in my life. Sorrowfully ill to be waking up like this. Not having a morning text from him as he would normally text me "Good morning beautiful!" That text was just enough to make me smile all day.
Why did we break things up? One second he was mine, and the other he was gone. I stayed on my bed until lunch time. Before I stood up, I checked if my ankle got any better, but when I moved my blanket off my legs and looked at my ankle, it was still big and swollen.
I was shocked, why isn't it getting any better? Anyways I just tried to bare with it and went downstairs, had my lunch and then went back up again. I don't know what was wrong that day. I was just feeling lonelier day by day. And I don't know how will I have to face Nathan again tomorrow, I've got to stop bursting into tears whenever I see him.
I mean, I don't want look desperate. I kept on thinking, as I always do. Thoughts always filled my mind, it almost felt suffocating sometimes. Suddenly, dad came in.
He said, "Hey, are you okay? I heard about your ankle."
I looked at him and said, "Hey dad. I'm fine, but my ankle is still swollen."
He walked towards me and said,"Let me see," he saw my ankle, and his face looked so surprised and then he said angrily, "I've got to take you to the hospital and see what they can do about it! I didn't know it was serious! You shoud have told me!"
I looked at my ankle and said, "I'm sorry dad, I was too tired, I went straight to bed. Ill be ready in a few minutes."
Dad calmed himself down and then said, "Okay then I’ll be waiting downstairs."
He closed the door. I didn't really feel like going to the hospital. I didn't really feel like there was a need. But I had to. And so I went to the hospital. The doctor said its maybe because I bent it or something. So the nurse kept some sort of cream and wrapped it up.
After I got home it was almost sunset by then. When I was about to go into the house, Zenny came out of nowhere and pulled me by the hand.
"Where are you going? Come let's go watch the sunset! I've got my dad's car key!! Ahahah"
I answered, "are you crazy? Were so dead if he catches us!"
Zenny giggled and gave me that devilish look, " IF he catches us! Cmon!" And she pulled me into the car.
We went to a beach a few miles away from the city. As I walked closer to the sea I looked at the sun that was slowly going down the horizon. As it went down, the burning light of the sun got dull and it looked like a huge disc of orange and yellow. The sun’s orange was mingling with the light blue colour of the sky and it gave out a vast contrast of different colours. It was like watching a screen slowly changing colours. The scene was truly beautiful. The dull light of the sun somehow illuminated everything in a way I had never seen them before. Everything was almost still and the effect of the light made the scene look like one in a painting.
The waves of the sea also seemed to have changed their colour to a dull mixture of yellow and orange. The water was sparkling like diamonds in the light. The sun was gradually going down and by the time it almost disappeared, the sky had patterns of different colours, from light purple to a dull blue. The scene looked mesmerizing. The birds were also chirping and flying away to their homes. The pleasant breeze, the sweet smell of salty water mixed in sand and the sound of waves crashing against each other completed the scene of a perfect sunset I had always read about in books.
Suddenly I heard a voice calling me from behind. It was bold but had a little bit of edginess to it. The voice sounded familiar. It was a guy ofcourse, but who was it. The wind blew stronger and I got a small hitch of his scent. I took in a deep breath as I enjoyed the musky smell. I knew who it was, I just didn't want to look back. It was too hard. I started looking sideways. Where did Zenny go? I got scared. I can't face this alone. I don't know how to react. What to do? What to say? Do I leave? Or hear what he has to say..?
He came and stood infront of me and there it was. Andrew the guy I left for Nathan. He changed! Is it me or andrew just got taller and hotter! I never really looked at him this close. Andrew had light brown hair, dreamy blue eyes as blue as a clear summer sky. His chest looked broad and muscular. He has this pointy nose and plump soft lips and I can't forget his adams apple so abvious and seductive. He was just perfect in everyway. His eyes sparkled with pain and he kept staring into my eyes and said,"Hello Bianca"
I looked down at the sand under my feet and side smiled. He lift my chin up and said, "Can you please tell me what else I should do? I've done everything I could think of to win you back! Wasn't it enough? We can't just end our relationship because I was too busy to talk to you for a little while!.."
The words were too painful for me to hear. He doesn't know the true reason of why I've left him. I brushed my hand through his brown silky hair and looked at him with my eyes about to cry,"Andrew.. Its not you. Its me. Don't blame yourself for me leaving you. You're a great guy and you deserve someone better than me."
Andrew took my hand off his face and held on to my other hand and said, "but Bianca, I don't want anyone else! Please Bianca. I can't live like this any more. Put an end to my suffering and come back to me."
I didn't know what to say. I never loved him truly. Its Nathan whom I love and still am inlove with. The situation was too sensitive and I coudnt tell him that there was someone else. He wouldn't forgive me. I can't break his heart even more than it is broken. With all that thinking in my mind I just burst and tears started falling down my cheeks. I covered my face with my hands and said, "I'm so sorry Andrew, but I have to leave"
Once I turned my back and was about to take a step away, Andrew pulled me back and hugged me tight and said,"Don't leave. Atleast just for today. Let me have you next to me" He wiped my tears and said, "Please Bianca don't leave"
I stared into his dreamy eyes. I couldn't stay. I don't want Andrew to be attached to me more than he is already. He doesn't deserve me. He deserves a better girl. Someone who will actually love him. Someone who wouldn't use him like I did. So I kissed him on the cheek and spoke with a whispering voice,"I'm sorry Andrew but I have to go. You take care of yourself alright"
He pulled my hand and still insisted but this time with his eyes. I let go, and walked away. As I walked away, my eyes started feeling watery again. It breaks my heart. Doing this to Andrew, making him go through this. But I couldn't confess it to him. I just can't. I do care about him, but not the boyfriend way. Just friends. Yeah just friends.
So I called Zenny,"where are you?!"
Zenny,"I'm at the parking lot"
I went into the car and when I put on my seat belt I told Zenny,"I hate you!"
Zenny replied,"sooo I get it that things didn't go well... Bianca he's a great guy, he doesn't deserve this"
I said,"I can't Zenny, I just can't. Just please take me home"
Zenny dropped me home, I got off the car without saying a word. I never treated Zenny like this, but today, I was angry. I didn't wanna talk because if I did, it would've lead to a fight. So I just kept quiet and went into the house.
I looked at the clock that was hung up near the kitchen door. It was 10 o'clock PM. I just fixed up my bag and made my stuff ready for tomorrow school. Then there I was laying on my bed with my eyes closed and me lost in deep sleep...
Why did we break things up? One second he was mine, and the other he was gone. I stayed on my bed until lunch time. Before I stood up, I checked if my ankle got any better, but when I moved my blanket off my legs and looked at my ankle, it was still big and swollen.
I was shocked, why isn't it getting any better? Anyways I just tried to bare with it and went downstairs, had my lunch and then went back up again. I don't know what was wrong that day. I was just feeling lonelier day by day. And I don't know how will I have to face Nathan again tomorrow, I've got to stop bursting into tears whenever I see him.
I mean, I don't want look desperate. I kept on thinking, as I always do. Thoughts always filled my mind, it almost felt suffocating sometimes. Suddenly, dad came in.
He said, "Hey, are you okay? I heard about your ankle."
I looked at him and said, "Hey dad. I'm fine, but my ankle is still swollen."
He walked towards me and said,"Let me see," he saw my ankle, and his face looked so surprised and then he said angrily, "I've got to take you to the hospital and see what they can do about it! I didn't know it was serious! You shoud have told me!"
I looked at my ankle and said, "I'm sorry dad, I was too tired, I went straight to bed. Ill be ready in a few minutes."
Dad calmed himself down and then said, "Okay then I’ll be waiting downstairs."
He closed the door. I didn't really feel like going to the hospital. I didn't really feel like there was a need. But I had to. And so I went to the hospital. The doctor said its maybe because I bent it or something. So the nurse kept some sort of cream and wrapped it up.
After I got home it was almost sunset by then. When I was about to go into the house, Zenny came out of nowhere and pulled me by the hand.
"Where are you going? Come let's go watch the sunset! I've got my dad's car key!! Ahahah"
I answered, "are you crazy? Were so dead if he catches us!"
Zenny giggled and gave me that devilish look, " IF he catches us! Cmon!" And she pulled me into the car.
We went to a beach a few miles away from the city. As I walked closer to the sea I looked at the sun that was slowly going down the horizon. As it went down, the burning light of the sun got dull and it looked like a huge disc of orange and yellow. The sun’s orange was mingling with the light blue colour of the sky and it gave out a vast contrast of different colours. It was like watching a screen slowly changing colours. The scene was truly beautiful. The dull light of the sun somehow illuminated everything in a way I had never seen them before. Everything was almost still and the effect of the light made the scene look like one in a painting.
The waves of the sea also seemed to have changed their colour to a dull mixture of yellow and orange. The water was sparkling like diamonds in the light. The sun was gradually going down and by the time it almost disappeared, the sky had patterns of different colours, from light purple to a dull blue. The scene looked mesmerizing. The birds were also chirping and flying away to their homes. The pleasant breeze, the sweet smell of salty water mixed in sand and the sound of waves crashing against each other completed the scene of a perfect sunset I had always read about in books.
Suddenly I heard a voice calling me from behind. It was bold but had a little bit of edginess to it. The voice sounded familiar. It was a guy ofcourse, but who was it. The wind blew stronger and I got a small hitch of his scent. I took in a deep breath as I enjoyed the musky smell. I knew who it was, I just didn't want to look back. It was too hard. I started looking sideways. Where did Zenny go? I got scared. I can't face this alone. I don't know how to react. What to do? What to say? Do I leave? Or hear what he has to say..?
He came and stood infront of me and there it was. Andrew the guy I left for Nathan. He changed! Is it me or andrew just got taller and hotter! I never really looked at him this close. Andrew had light brown hair, dreamy blue eyes as blue as a clear summer sky. His chest looked broad and muscular. He has this pointy nose and plump soft lips and I can't forget his adams apple so abvious and seductive. He was just perfect in everyway. His eyes sparkled with pain and he kept staring into my eyes and said,"Hello Bianca"
I looked down at the sand under my feet and side smiled. He lift my chin up and said, "Can you please tell me what else I should do? I've done everything I could think of to win you back! Wasn't it enough? We can't just end our relationship because I was too busy to talk to you for a little while!.."
The words were too painful for me to hear. He doesn't know the true reason of why I've left him. I brushed my hand through his brown silky hair and looked at him with my eyes about to cry,"Andrew.. Its not you. Its me. Don't blame yourself for me leaving you. You're a great guy and you deserve someone better than me."
Andrew took my hand off his face and held on to my other hand and said, "but Bianca, I don't want anyone else! Please Bianca. I can't live like this any more. Put an end to my suffering and come back to me."
I didn't know what to say. I never loved him truly. Its Nathan whom I love and still am inlove with. The situation was too sensitive and I coudnt tell him that there was someone else. He wouldn't forgive me. I can't break his heart even more than it is broken. With all that thinking in my mind I just burst and tears started falling down my cheeks. I covered my face with my hands and said, "I'm so sorry Andrew, but I have to leave"
Once I turned my back and was about to take a step away, Andrew pulled me back and hugged me tight and said,"Don't leave. Atleast just for today. Let me have you next to me" He wiped my tears and said, "Please Bianca don't leave"
I stared into his dreamy eyes. I couldn't stay. I don't want Andrew to be attached to me more than he is already. He doesn't deserve me. He deserves a better girl. Someone who will actually love him. Someone who wouldn't use him like I did. So I kissed him on the cheek and spoke with a whispering voice,"I'm sorry Andrew but I have to go. You take care of yourself alright"
He pulled my hand and still insisted but this time with his eyes. I let go, and walked away. As I walked away, my eyes started feeling watery again. It breaks my heart. Doing this to Andrew, making him go through this. But I couldn't confess it to him. I just can't. I do care about him, but not the boyfriend way. Just friends. Yeah just friends.
So I called Zenny,"where are you?!"
Zenny,"I'm at the parking lot"
I went into the car and when I put on my seat belt I told Zenny,"I hate you!"
Zenny replied,"sooo I get it that things didn't go well... Bianca he's a great guy, he doesn't deserve this"
I said,"I can't Zenny, I just can't. Just please take me home"
Zenny dropped me home, I got off the car without saying a word. I never treated Zenny like this, but today, I was angry. I didn't wanna talk because if I did, it would've lead to a fight. So I just kept quiet and went into the house.
I looked at the clock that was hung up near the kitchen door. It was 10 o'clock PM. I just fixed up my bag and made my stuff ready for tomorrow school. Then there I was laying on my bed with my eyes closed and me lost in deep sleep...
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